It never rains but it pours

So as I noted in the previous entry, last week on Tuesday my dog Kinsey was diagnosed with end stage kidney failure and we made the decision to let her go on Friday. We took a few days to spoil her and prepare ourselves.

It was like Kinsey understood what the vet was saying, cause after we took her home on Tuesday she got very sick very fast. She had been pretty crotchety before but suddenly she couldn’t walk at all without help, often couldn’t even stand up on her own without a push from me.

I stayed up for 48 hours straight in her last days because she kept trying to walk places, getting stuck and becoming extremely distressed. I don’t know if she was in pain but she was frustrated and confused.

So on Friday we cooked a steak for Kinsey and after that the vet came over. It was very hard to say goodbye to her but Michael and I were 120% sure it was the right thing for Kinsey. It would have been cruel to make her wait any longer. She would have been 17 in a few weeks.

During this time I noticed Carmen, one of our two cats, was acting grumpy and distant and was off her food. Initially we thought she was just stressed cause of the situation. But this morning, on further reflection, I decided she probably had a urinary tract infection and so I took her to the vet’s.

The vet confirmed a UTI but also noticed some other alarming things and did some tests and x-rays. It turned out Carmen’s kidneys and liver were failing and she had a mass on her abdomen that was probably cancer. The vet pretty much said there was nothing to be done.

I called Michael and he came over and Carmen went peacefully to sleep with us holding her. She was only twelve.

Two of our three beloved pets are gone in just a few days. Both of them often kept me company while I worked on cases.

I still plan to resume updates etc tomorrow. No point just sitting around wallowing in grief.

It’ll feel so strange, working in my office with just one cat hanging around.

Everyone has been so supportive and I want to thank all of you. I love you guys more than you know.

23 thoughts on “It never rains but it pours

  1. beckey November 1, 2021 / 7:51 pm

    I’m so, so, so sorry. I’ve been through all of this and it is incredibly tough. You gave them a wonderful life. Thanks for being there for them and not being selfish and making them suffer. Give lots of extra love to your remaining fur baby. love and hugs to you!

  2. David S Schwartz November 1, 2021 / 7:59 pm

    I am truly sorry for your loss, I know that working from home they must have been a great source of comfort for you. I agree that it was loving to think of their suffering and loss selfishly of your loss. Take care and give lots of love to your remaining pet and may you have great joy in the memories they each provided you.

  3. thequeenofsorrow22 November 1, 2021 / 8:06 pm

    I’m so sorry about your pets!

  4. Mia November 1, 2021 / 8:14 pm

    Oh Meaghan. What a big loss to process. I hope when the time comes, another cat and/or dog chooses you and Michael. You guys are wonderful pet parents.

  5. Leaman November 1, 2021 / 8:15 pm

    It breaks my heart to read this, Meaghan. I hope the best for you, as you get through this awful time.

  6. Jack November 1, 2021 / 8:19 pm

    Your Carmen looks so much like my Maddie, who I had to say goodbye to last year when her health took a sudden turn. And Kinsey looks so happy in that photo! I am so very sorry you and Michael are going through this. It’s so hard to do, even when you know it is the best last decision you can make for them.

  7. Ashley November 1, 2021 / 8:33 pm

    Oh no! I’m so sorry you had to say goodbye to both Kinsey and Carmen in such a short time. I love that photo of Kinsey, she looks so sweet and happy.

  8. Chris Mielke November 1, 2021 / 8:44 pm

    Meaghan, I’m so sorry. You and Michael did the right thing, but it is still so hard. All the best.

  9. christie groves November 1, 2021 / 10:23 pm

    Oh no! I am so sad for them and you no one ever likes to say goodbye to a fur person or them the fur persons human. You gave Kinsey an amazing life I remember when you decided to take her because her sibling passed and you didn’t want her living in the garage alone or something to that effect! I’m sorry about your cat as well, I don’t need to tell you how sensitive I am to this kind of loss because you know but my heart and eyes are crying a bit. Pets mean so much. Stay strong! Love, Christie Newt Bishop Halo Ember xoxo

  10. Anthony Ziegler November 1, 2021 / 11:21 pm

    Im sorry for your loss. Never thought I’d own a dog, much less 2, now I cant imagine life without them. Condolences to you both.

  11. Amanda November 2, 2021 / 2:22 am

    This is terrible… I’ve been there, and it’s never easy, even when you know it’s best for them. My thoughts are with you and your husband. RIP Kinsey and Carmen.

  12. Adelaide November 2, 2021 / 6:21 am

    I’m so, so sorry for the loss of your beloved pets! I hope the many positive memories of your life with Kinsey and Carmen can be of some comfort to you right now. I’m certain while they were here you made a huge difference to them as a wonderful caring human and they had great lives being cared for by you and Michael.

  13. K. Kim November 2, 2021 / 7:18 am

    Very sorry to hear your sad news. Sounds like your pets had wonderful lives, living with owners who loved them very much.

  14. hennylee November 2, 2021 / 8:42 am

    Oh Meaghan, I am so very sorry to hear this, Losing a pet is such a hard thing – but you were a loving Fur mom and they both lived a wonderful life no doubt. Thinking of you and Michael in this tough time. Hang in there. ❤

  15. Cid November 2, 2021 / 9:48 am

    Meaghan, I am so very sorry for your and Michael’s loss. Our critters hold such special places in our hearts, and even when we know it’s the best thing, it is so heartbreaking to let them go. For us, it was very hard to adjust to the loss of the”background noise” of tippy tappy feet, and a warm nose burrowing under hands for a snuggle. Sending you all much love 💜

  16. Ellen Tallabas November 2, 2021 / 11:35 am

    Lord have mercy!!! I am overcome with sadness for you. My little one, Petey has kidney failure. He is 16 and we are in the “just keep him happy mode” his meds keep him pretty happy and pain free for now. I am not looking forward to what you are going through. I am so sorry Meaghan. With Tons of Love sent your way, Ellen Tallabas. ❤️

  17. Leslie November 2, 2021 / 11:55 am

    I’m so, so sorry, Meaghan. Sending you cyber hugs and love.

  18. Cherie November 2, 2021 / 12:03 pm

    I’m so, so sorry about your losses. I’ve been there, and I know how much it hurts.

  19. Emily Jones November 3, 2021 / 11:43 pm

    I’m so sorry to hear about your beloved kinsey and carmen. it’s so hard to lose them. Thank you for giving them both a happy life and for not prolonging their suffering. You’re a kind person. Here’s to your healing ❤

  20. lisabwatson November 4, 2021 / 6:00 am

    So very sorry to hear this, Meaghan! Even when you know logically it’s the right thing for your beloved pet, it’s still so very hard to let them go. Comfort to you and Michael and I hope you someday feel ready to find a new fur buddy. xo

  21. Irene November 5, 2021 / 10:25 pm

    Hugs and kisses…
    Been there…..

  22. Gina C. November 10, 2021 / 5:24 am

    Dearest Meaghan, what’s left of my heart and soul goes out to you. I am in a similar situation as you were. My baby is dying of cancer as we speak. I’m powerless, enraged, hopeless and beyond sad. I had 2 kidz. I moved to AZ and the vet gave us Nextgard, she died from it. She did not care she killed my baby. I jumped from office to office begging for assistance. They claimed they could not understand why she was walking sideways. In the meantime all of the vets ignored, robbed, and delayed treatment. They performed surgery on her she didn’t need. She got better, then had a stroke. I don’t have children, family or friends, they’re all I have. We had to travel miles to an emergency hospital while she had seizures. They put her down like it was nothing at all. I received her ashes, minus her teeth, in a dollar store baggie for a thousand dollars. Not to mention all the treatment We sought. When l contacted the company, they said no one had ever reported an adverse reaction. We quickly got another kid due to the grief of my son. She was sweet, high strung and good. I couldn’t take her to the vet. Either one, for fear they would kill them too. I had to be the vet and order meds. One day my son screamed so loud l nearly fell out. I called every place around here.. They’re so gross, greedy and immoral, they would not take walk ins! I rushed him to the same dump hospital who refused to help us immediately! We were resigned to the parking lot. Waiting in line! When my husband tried to rush in, the doors were locked. Only because of several people in the parking lot outraged did they let us in. He was unconscious and pale. They wouldn’t let us in or perform any treatment until they swiped our debit card. They found all the same things they found in your cat. Told us to put him down. We didn’t. He survived after that we were told he had a mass and 2 forms of cancer. I had noticed a couple of moles on him. As soon as they told us, they started getting bigger. He started getting weaker and l was more of a mess. Meanwhile, my other kid started getting mean, jealous, and out of control. I never minded it before but now it was too much. I had to give her up. My soul! I couldn’t take her to a vet and couldn’t lose another child. I never should have gotten her. I hate everyone here. She was all the “good” l had in this despicable state of demonic people. My husband takes my son to work with him. They love and treat him so well. I can’t even cherish our time together. I’m terrified, furious, beyond grief. I can’t breathe most days. I’ve never been alone and my rage is paralyzing. Thankfully. I say goodbye everyday because l can not be sure l will be able to make that drive. Or see those Demons, again. I’m most disgusted at myself l thought l was giving them and us a better life. I didn’t know l was dead the day we moved here. I’ve been dying ever since
    I’ve lost and let go of everything that mattered. I don’t even know the person l become. And my last bit of humanity is winding down. I read your post and you sound like me most days. Only you are a treasure beyond mercy and grace. My worse days I’m glad to have witness your unabashed good and selflessness. I wish l could take your pain from you. I wish l was more to shower your hearts desire and protect you from your fears. Unfortunately, none of my wishes come true. Nevertheless, I’m in awe of you. Thank you so much for all you do. Your strength is cherished and admired. You are never alone. Please accept my deepest sympathy.

  23. Sonya November 11, 2021 / 10:32 pm

    I feel so bad for your loss. What a beautiful, beautiful kitty. I’m sure you gave Carmen a very good life. I also know from your posts on here that you rescued Kinsey and gave her a great home in her later years. I’m sure she was so grateful in her little doggie heart to have the both of you for doggie parents. It was probably her dream come true.

    I hope your remaining cat is doing okay. That is a big loss, losing a dog and cat companion all at once and might make the kitty lonely. I hope you are doing okay, as well. I’m so sorry for your loss.

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