I also hate it when this happens, but for different reasons

I got an email the other day that just said, “My wife is [an MP who’s been missing for nearly 50 years]’s sister. Please contact me.”

I wrote back saying, “How can I help you?”

And he responded the next day saying he was so glad I answered; he’d emailed a lot of people and I was the only one so far who had replied. The case was still open but the police seemed to be doing nothing to investigate it, and weren’t answering his or his wife’s phone calls, were brushing them off, etc. He really didn’t know what to do and was begging for my assistance.

I’ve gotten a lot of emails like that over years and I always feel horrible about them. They make me feel terribly guilty because I can’t really do anything to help this poor guy or his sister. I’m just a private citizen who publicizes missing person cases; I have no credentials, no influence, I’m not a cop or any other kind of investigator. I can offer nothing but sympathy. I know I SHOULDN’T feel guilty for being unable to help this family — after all, I do a lot more than most people — but I do anyway. They’ve been through a lot.

I’ll refer him to Project Jason, I guess. They can provide moral support, anyway, and will understand him better than I can.

Sigh. One person can’t save the world. One of the things I’ve been trying to learn through therapy is to stop taking the weight of everyone’s sufferings and putting it on my own skinny shoulders. Maybe someday the message will sink in.

6 thoughts on “I also hate it when this happens, but for different reasons

  1. Storyteller August 23, 2012 / 4:11 pm

    Oh but you do help and one person can, just by being there and answering his email and directing to other sites and by writing about just this gives others the ability to do something themselves.

    My pet MP is Connie Smith who went missing in Connecticut in 1952, 60 years ago. Her father just died this year over 90.

    My other cold case is Little Miss X in Flagstaff and Donnis Redman along with her boyfriend Michael Griffin.

    Publishing information, like you do, give another avenue for people to discover and maybe share information that just might bring closure to a family.

    Thanks for all you do,


  2. Christine August 25, 2012 / 11:11 pm

    I don’t understand your first paragraph, is it his wife or sister missing?

    • Meaghan August 26, 2012 / 5:28 pm

      Neither. His wife’s sister — his own sister-in-law.

  3. amy August 26, 2012 / 1:11 am

    Tell them to contact local media and/or media in the area the sister went missing. Sometimes if the law won’t get involved, a media story might help open some doors. Tell them to continue to go to the police, write them. call them- keep at it. I would tell them to contact both televized news and print news- the local paper if it’s still running. That’s how things get re-opened.

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