Alas, more jumpers

Only a week ago I wrote about some probable suicides on Charley, mostly Golden Gate Bridge related. And today, sadly, I added two more: Matthew Sueper, who was seen jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge last August, and Paresh Jain, who was probably a Golden Gate Bridge suicide too. At least I know he disappeared in San Francisco and it was more or less immediately ruled a suicide. I can’t find any mention of the bridge but I’d be surprised if that wasn’t his chosen method. He came there all the way from Virginia to do it — 2,700 miles.

Both of these were young men: 22 and 25, respectively. Right in the prime of their lives. And from the web postings I found by the friends and family they left behind, it’s obvious they were loved. Makes you wonder what happened.

14 thoughts on “Alas, more jumpers

  1. Saffy March 18, 2012 / 8:45 am

    men commit suicide at a much higher rate than women and it’s one of the leading causes of death in young people. Looking at the Matthew Sueper memorial, it’s hard to figure out. He seemed to have lots of friends, a close family, girlfriends. There is no mention of any trouble. Maybe he simply suffered from depression and no one knew. That is often the case when men suffer from depression. They don’t get help or treatment.

  2. Val March 18, 2012 / 2:25 pm

    Looking through Matthew Sueper’s memorial, it appears that one of his best friend’s from high school and one of his cousins committed suicide. It looks like he had a close family and valued his friendships, so those deaths probably affected him a lot. It’s possible that he was already a little raw from those deaths, and all that was needed was a minor trigger to push him over the edge. If that makes sense.

    • Meaghan March 18, 2012 / 4:32 pm

      Suicide tends to run in families. It’s not genetic; it’s just learned behavior.

      What bothers me particularly about these two is that obviously their actions were premeditated. Each man drove a considerable distance to the Golden Gate Bridge, over state lines, and in Paresh’s case all across the country. Most suicides — and this applies to the Golden Gate Bridge probably more than ever — are impulsive or at least sort of impulsive acts, but these two had to have been planning it for days at least. Carefully planned suicides are about as rare as carefully planned murders.

      They really need to construct a barrier on the bridge. People say “they will just find someplace else to kill themselves” but that’s not true. Other people are concerned about aesthetics, but in the book on Golden Gate Bridge suicides it talks about an architect who won an award for constructing a practically invisible suicide barrier on another bridge.

    • Saffy March 18, 2012 / 6:08 pm

      it mentioned a cousin passing away but not suicide, or the friend…so that could have something to do with it. We will probably never know.

  3. Val March 18, 2012 / 7:03 pm

    I looked the cousin up, and I believe that it was suicide as well. At least the article I found said that it was. I don’t know why it wasn’t mentioned though. And I completely agree with the barrier. So many lives could be saved if only something would be put up. The Golden Gate Bridge is a romantic symbol to some people. They will only commit suicide if it is off of that bridge. If a barrier is put up, those lives will be saved.

    • Meaghan March 18, 2012 / 7:59 pm

      A small percentage of the bridge jumpers survive. Of the survivors, only a few have gone on to kill themselves. No matter what method is used, the majority of suicide attempters wind up feeling glad they survived the attempt.

      I have a friend who knows a guy who survived a Golden Gate Bridge jump. He said the guy, as he was falling, suddenly realized he’d thought he had horrible catastrophic problems, but in fact the problems weren’t that bad, and now he had a catastrophe: that he’d just jumped off the bridge and there was nothing to do but fall, and die.

      The problem is that most people (A) Don’t understand how the suicidal mind works and (B) Have little or no sympathy for them and think they deserved their fate. That’s why it’s so hard to put in such simple suicide prevention methods like a bridge barrier.

  4. meyahna March 18, 2012 / 8:52 pm

    I read someone say exatcly the same that when they were falling they thought after all, all their problems weren’t so important. I don’t know if anti suicide barreers would prevent suicides. There are always other bridges, and if not buildings, ravines. Makes me think about Amy Bradley, always thought she committed suicide, looks like cruise ships can also draw people to suicide. There are a few cases like that too among missing.

    • Meaghan March 18, 2012 / 9:16 pm

      Regarding the Golden Gate Bridge, I think a barrier would prevent suicides, because that bridge is seen as “special” because it’s a national landmark and all, and people prefer to jump off of it. There’s a bridge nearby — actually within sight of the Golden Gate Bridge — that’s just as high over the water and doesn’t have a barrier either, and logically they would have a similar suicide rate, but almost no one jumps off the second bridge.

      In Japan there’s a forest that’s notorious for suicides. It’s gotten so bad that the government has put up signs there, telling people to not give up hope, here’s a suicide hotline number, etc. But people keep hanging themselves there. And just in THAT particular forest, not in the dozens, hundreds of other forests in the country.

  5. Melissa March 19, 2012 / 5:30 am

    Both were in the prime demographic group for suicide, unfortunately – given their age and sex. Sad 

  6. meyahna March 19, 2012 / 7:24 pm

    What’s sad is I don’t think people who jump from bridges think about what will happen to their body. I’m sure they don’t mean to harm more their families with a missing body. Suicidal people are so focused on death that the rest they don’t think about it. Or they just think their body will come back to the surface it’s very abstract for them. Yet a missing body always is an additional pain. It’s all very sad, many young men commit suicide after a break up but had they waited they’d have gone through this and found another girlfriend and ended by finding it stupid to have wanted to die for so few.

  7. Shashi Jain August 2, 2012 / 10:09 pm

    This is Paresh Jain’s mother. I am still waiting for my son to come back. We have to find a way to stop people jumping from the Golden Gate Bridge. It is just so crazy that no body has done any thing to prevent suicide on the Bridge. I wish our Government gives fund for the barrier.
    The pain in my heart is so sharp that nobody can even imagine. If any body finds my son, please notify San Francisco police.

    • Meaghan August 4, 2012 / 7:54 am

      I fully agree with you. Awhile back I got into an argument with a San Francisco resident who was totally opposed to a barrier and said people would just find another way to kill themselves. But it seems to me that that’s like saying, “We shouldn’t try to come up with a method to stop the enemy’s superweapon from killing us during war, because they’ll just come up with another superweapon.”

      • Shashi Jain August 4, 2012 / 10:59 pm

        This is what I have heard from others as well but it is absoluetly rediculous. This has no logic at all. It is very easy to say for these people because they haven’t suffered this pain. If one of these people go through with similar situation, I can bet they willl never say it.

        I am still thinking for a miracle.

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