38 thoughts on “A Stolen Life

  1. Princess Shantae July 27, 2011 / 8:33 am

    Its bound to be popular. It got hyped so much on TV and in the paper everybody wants to read it. It will be a best seller even if its a crappy writing job.

  2. Kat July 27, 2011 / 10:51 am

    The wait times are only going to get worse I think, since they’ve closed Borders now.

  3. Kristen July 27, 2011 / 4:44 pm

    That’s why I went ahead and purchased a copy from Amazon. I think it was $14 or something – pretty reasonable, I thought.

  4. CarlK90245 July 27, 2011 / 7:08 pm

    I’ve read the book already. I was a little disappointed in how she takes a lot of cheap shots at her step father, Carl. Apparently, he maintained a level of discipline in the household, (e.g., insisting that she brush her teeth after every meal and chew her food with her mouth closed), and she continues to hold a grudge. Yet, she insists that she harbors no hate toward Phil and Nancy Garrido. Granted, the degree of Carl Probyn’s suffering doesn’t compare to the that of Jaycee or her mother, but nevertheless, he had to take a lot of guff from Terry’s family and the Police, and he should be allowed to participate in the healing.

    The book is well worth the read though. She gets a little graphic, but not unnecessarily so. I wish she could have provided a little more detail about the telephone call and the reunion. I’ve spent two years trying to imagine what an amazing moment that must have been, but after the Diane Sawyer interview, and the book, I am still left wanting more detail.

      • CarlK90245 July 27, 2011 / 10:40 pm

        That is disgusting. What a scumbag.

        I don’t know if Probyn has a case for libel, but I would sue the bastard if I were he.

    • Dave November 30, 2016 / 2:40 pm

      I’m reading the Stolen Life book … seems to me Carl wasn’t the loving supportive step father he should have been. He gives step fathers a bad rap.

  5. Sibyl Reagan July 27, 2011 / 8:13 pm

    I’ve read it, too. I agree with the above review. Absolutely spot on. I left my copy in the condo we were in on vacation, hopefully someone else will find it and give it a go.

  6. Princess Shantae July 27, 2011 / 11:12 pm

    I read where Jaycee said a big reason why she never even tried to escape was b/c she hated her stepfather so much and thought he hated her as well. The man tried to rescue her after she was snatched, and was questioned and questioned about his being involved for a long time. And she is way too old to still be pouting about him making her brush her teeth and chew with her mouth closed. I couldn’t get over that level of brattiness in a grown woman who has so many other bigger things to be bitter about.

    • Meaghan July 27, 2011 / 11:36 pm

      Well, you have to consider that she didn’t have an opportunity to grow up in the normal way. Her entire adolescence and young adulthood, she didn’t have normal interactions with older adults, peers her own age, anything like that. So she’s probably quite immature in many ways you or I wouldn’t be able to comprehend.

    • CarlK90245 July 28, 2011 / 2:38 am

      Shawn Hornbeck didn’t think his stepfather hated him, and he couldn’t muster the courage to flee.

      Elizabeth Smart loved her father, yet didn’t flee either. On at least one occasion they were approached by a police officer who wanted to look under her veil. She could have shouted out – “It’s me!!!”, but she didn’t. Her captors protested, and the officer relented and left.

      Natasha Kampusch was able to escape after 8 years, but that seems to be the exception.

      Jaycee’s inability to muster the courage to flee had nothing to do with her stepfather, regardless of any hints otherwise. She didn’t even have an opportunity to flee until she was already the mother of small children. By then, Garrido had her convinced that the world outside of the walls of their home was too scary.

      • Meaghan July 28, 2011 / 4:11 am

        Natascha came from a dysfunctional home. If I recall correctly, the morning she was kidnapped, her mother actually smacked her or something before she set off for school. But all the others you mention came from decent families.

        Except, perhaps, Steven. I haven’t heard anything bad about his parents, but it seems to me that happy, healthy homes don’t produce a serial killer.

    • CarlK90245 July 28, 2011 / 2:55 am

      I should add that Steven Stayner was able to escape from his captor, but that was after his captor kidnapped another boy, It was only at that point, Steven’s empathy for the boy outweighed his fear of fleeing.

    • forthelost July 28, 2011 / 11:48 am

      Her stepfather was the one looking after her when she was kidnapped, right? I wonder if those complaints are really just a screen for “he allowed me to be kidnapped.” That’s not rational of course, but it would be hard to be rational in a situation like that.

  7. Princess Shantae July 28, 2011 / 7:48 am

    I think Elizabeth Smart’s religious training had a lot to do with why she never resisted. A friend of mine who is Mormon says that in general Mormons are very trusting and naive, and Mormon girls are raised to trust men and do what they ask. Also Elizabeth realy believed her kidnapper would send an angel with a sword after her if she escaped.
    Only in Utah would the cops let a veiled girl in public pass without further investigating.

    • Meaghan July 28, 2011 / 8:25 am

      Regards the veil, I don’t think that’s necessarily true. There must be Muslim women in major cities who wear face-covering veils.

      (Though probably not many in this country. You may recall France’s controversial law a year or so ago that banned women from wearing the burqa in public. It is disturbing that they felt the need to legislate one’s choice of clothing, but the fact is that the law affected only like 40 women.)

  8. Celeste July 28, 2011 / 11:05 am

    It looks interesting. I also saw “Lost and Found The True Life Story of Jacee Lee Dugard” by John Glatt. But I would rather hear the entire story from Jacee herself rather than from someone who doesn’t know her at all.

    • CarlK90245 July 28, 2011 / 12:36 pm

      I read the John Glatt book as well. The book contains no first-hand information from the family. It is basically a compilation of everything I already knew from browsing news stories on the internet and Keith Morrison’s Dateline episode on the Jaycee story. He lifts quotes from Jaycee’s grade school classmates right out of that Dateline episode.

      If you are unfamiliar with the story, or if you have not been following it closely, it is very complete and informative. If you have been following the story, as I have, there is nothing new.

  9. Kim Bouck August 3, 2011 / 1:48 am

    I read the book on my kindle. Yes she certainly slammed her step-father Carl. Alot of step-dads are jerks to their step-kids so who knows if he was really that bad. I was surprised she did not really say anything nice about him.

  10. Justin August 14, 2011 / 6:42 pm

    So, did you read Jaycee Dugard’s A Stolen Life. yet?

  11. scott August 21, 2011 / 6:00 am

    yup. you all managed to make the story of a girl/woman who surived and overcame the most disgusting thing ever into a story of an ungrateful brat who misjudged her stepfather.

    congrats……did you guys miss the part where carl made jaycee eat her dinner in front of the bathroom mirror? is that normal dad behavior? disciplince? what kind of sick pathetic BS is that????

    jaycee is a hero and an inspiration and you people make her out to be a spoiled selfish idiot.

    so jaycee didnt escape cause she hated carl? really? what?!!? could it be she was locked in a shed for 7 or 8 years and only allowed ‘freedoms’ when she had two babies and was nearly impossible to make a run for it? how about the fact she thought she was protecting other children by taking the abuse herself?

    and carlk…….what else do you need to know that she didnt cover? be glad she had the strength to share any of her story.

    oh……and somehow you all convienently missed how she used money from the 20 million dollar settlement to start a foundation for families like own, and is using part of her book sales for that as well.

    she is a beacon of hope for the lost, the abused the kidnapped the hepless. since this site is ALLEDGEDLY about that…….i would think you people would give her more credit.

    I Should be happy that you guys didnt spend 40 post talking about her teeth again, i guess

  12. scott August 21, 2011 / 6:06 am

    about the phone call they were obviously both so excited its probably a jamble in there brains…….jaycee remembers saying ‘come quick!” and “i love you!’ and hearing her mom says to her people at work ‘my daughters been found!” terry for her part, the only part they played in the diane sawyer interview was her telling the fbi man on the phone ‘dont do this to me, this isnt funny!” when she thought the call was a sick jokei dont know why they edited out more of what terry remembers, which im sure she does. oh and ‘im coming baby, im coming!”

    as for the reunion i thought she did enough with the hugging, and crying. i thought the part where jaycee tells her ‘you smell the same’ is funny cause terry says ‘its the smoke’. reminds me of the people magazine article from 1991 where terry said she smoke packs upon packs of cigerretes the day she was kidnapped…..i guess full circle lol. and then the stuff with them looking at the moon the same night and thinking of each other right before they were found was great.

    • CarlK90245 August 21, 2011 / 4:38 pm

      I’ve watched that portion of the Diane Sawyer interview numerous times, and I still get a rush of emotion each time.

      They did touch on that moment a bit, but I felt like they could have provided a lot more detail.

      For two years, I have tried to visualize that moment of the phone call. What exactly did the detectives say to Terry when she answered the phone? They didn’t discuss that at all.

      We know that she replied “Don’t do this to me. it’s not funny”, but I knew that from Carl Probyn’s interviews days after Jaycee was found. How did she transition from “this is a bad joke” to “this is really true!!”? We know that Terry quizzed Jaycee about details that only Jaycee would know. But they didn’t discuss that at all either in the Diane Sawyer interview or in the book.

      About the reunion, they didn’t discuss that at all in the Sawyer interview, and only bits and pieces in the book. She talked about standing at the threshold of the room in which Terry was waiting and hesitating. And when she finally entered, there was instant recognition even though she had forgotten what her mother looked like. She talked about the hugs and the smell (not of the cigarettes but of Terry’s own unique scent), and the talk about how the moon reminded them of each other. But I was left wanting more. It may just be that it’s impossible to provide a narrative that adequately conveys what had to have been such an amazing visual.

      I also would have liked to know how she explained her real identity to her daughters, although I can understand why that might be a personal private thing that she wouldn’t want to publicly discuss.

  13. scott August 21, 2011 / 6:15 am

    and i dont ever see one word where she blames him for her kidnaping. i guess thats just your psych eval of her writing style.

    • CarlK90245 August 21, 2011 / 3:39 pm

      You obviously read more into my comments than what I had put there.

      I found the book very inspiring and I commend Jaycee for all that she was able to overcome. It was her story that got me interested in the subject of missing persons, and I have spent quite a bit of my spare time focused on that topic in the last two years.

      I just didn’t think the bit about making her watch herself eat in the mirror was very alarming. Different people have different approaches to teaching manners to their children. He took a more strict approach than most, but I don’t equate it with emotional abuse. I think it would have been much worse if he was to sit quietly and let the bad eating habits become ingrained.


      I don’t see one word where anyone here alleged that. Nobody here said that she blames him for the kidnapping. It was Don Regis-Bilar (the Lake Tahoe journalist) who alleged that, and said I think he is a dirtbag for continuing to stick by that allegation even after it became crystal clear that Carl Probyn had no connection to the Garridos.

      Actually, she never actually said in the book that she didn’t want to escape because of Carl. But she did say that she thought that Carl was happier that she was gone, and that one of the many things that she worried about was whether Carl was still with her mother.

      In what was otherwise a very inspiring story of healing, I just thought that it would have been better to not take so many gratuitous swipes at Carl Probyn.

      • CarlK90245 August 21, 2011 / 3:44 pm

        Note: I quoted your previous comment between the “<>”, but this site blocked it out.

      • Matthew M. October 8, 2020 / 3:02 am

        I think we need to remember that Jaycee wrote “A Stolen Life” while still psychologically being 11 years old. She admits this herself in the Afterward she added to the 2012 paperback edition of her book. As well I believe a good proton of the book was a therapeutic exercise and she was trying to convey to the reader the thoughts and feelings she had for Carl at the time of her abduction.

        I’m afraid I disagree with the idea that Carl making Jaycee eat her meal in front of a mirror was abusive. I don’t agree with it but don’t most parents do things that are wrong or unkind once in a while. It was certainly an unorthodox way of parenting but I wouldn’t say it was abusive. As well we don’t know if Terry, Jaycee’s mom, was present at this incident so if she stayed silent than technically she would complicit in this “abuse”. Carl was obviously strict and probably felt Jaycee was babied and needed more responsibly but I wouldn’t call that abuse. As for Jaycee being sent to stay with relatives I don’t think Carl secretly packed her up and sent her on her way with Terry knowing. So, Terry would be complicit in this as well.

        Some people have implicitly blamed Carl for Jaycee’s abduction by mentioning how Jaycee wrote that she though it was Carl’s decision for Jaycee to walk to the bus stop alone starting with the 1989-1990 school year. However, this contradicts what Terry said during a 1993 appearance with Carl on “Gerardo Rivera” show. Terry said that back in the city Jayce wasn’t allowed to walk to school on her own and that Terry would drive her and Carl would pick her up. She didn’t start walking to school on her own until the 1990-1991 school year. But who knows whose memory is correct there.

        Unfortunately, the vandetta the Dugard Family has against Carl appears to have had consequences beyond how they affected Jaycee. From the looks of Jaycee’s second book “Freedom: My Book of Firsts” Carl is no longer in touch with Shayna, Jaycee’s sister and Carl’s daughter as Carl was not at Shayna’s wedding. I only hope Shayna’s apparent decision to cut contact suit Carl was her own and not influenced by Jaycee, Terry and the Dugard’s feelings about him.

        Finally, people need to remember that it was Carl who first tried to catch the Garrido’s when they first took Jaycee and then called 911! Carl stood by Terry Probyn’s side for the first four to five years after the abduction. Even after they split they were allegedly still friends and on good terms.

        People need to stop bashing Carl based solely on Jaycee’s book. This is not to take away from how incredible, graceful and awe-inspiring Jaycee is because she is all of those things!! But people need to read Jaycee’s comments on Carl within their proper context.

  14. Sara August 21, 2011 / 6:59 pm

    “Actually, she never actually said in the book that she didn’t want to escape because of Carl.”

    CarlK90245 did you read the grand jury transcripts? when asked why she didn’t try to escape she says:

    “I felt like I didn’t have anywhere else to go. I knew my stepdad. He, I always felt like he didn’t like me…that he would, they would be happier or they would be better off without my being there at home,”

    • CarlK90245 August 21, 2011 / 8:35 pm

      Despite what she said in the grand jury, I doubt that she would have tried to escape had there been no Carl Probyn, or if Carl had not acted the way that he did toward her.

      She behaved the same way that other children (e.g., S. Hornbeck, E. Smart, et.al.) behaved under similar circumstances.

      She had not even the slightest opportunity to escape until after her daughter was born, and for several years thereafter, it wouldn’t have been logistically feasible to take two young children and run anyway. And she wasn’t about to go anywhere without taking her two children with her. By the time that the children were old enough and she wasn’t under 24-hour lockdown, her old life had become a distant memory.

      Garrido had her convinced (1) the world was too scary outside of the confines of their home, and (2) that he was all-knowing and was always aware of what she was up to. She had access to the internet, and never once Googled her own name. On one occasion, she even saw a news promo discussing her case in the context of the Polly Klass murder, and didn’t try to watch the news segment.

      I don’t doubt that she rationalized her inaction by convincing herself that her mother and stepfather didn’t love her anyway. But I don’t believe it.

      • Sara August 21, 2011 / 10:32 pm

        Maybe you’re right I don’t know, but I think his treatment of her played a part in her feelings of hopelessness/helplessness.

        By the way,I watched a short clip Chris Cuomo is talking with Terry about the phone call,Terry said: I hear a voice and I knew was her and she said mama? mom?.

  15. scott August 21, 2011 / 9:23 pm

    i dont think she ever believed her mom didnt love her.

    i would like to point out, rationally this time, that her perspective in the book about carl, 90 percent of the time, is coming from how she felt during whatever time period that is based in. like on the day she was kidnapped or on christmas 93 (even i admit that was REALLY harsh

    i also read that horrendous article by blier or whatever the pond scums name is. i quite frankly told him in the comments ection (which he liked to post on) to put up or shut up…..never heard another word from him.

    he never had any evidence cause there was never any to begin with.

    he’s just a weasal looking to save his reputation that he destroyed himself. and if he hurts jaycee or terry along the way thats fine with him.

    i thought the thing about the mirror, however, was way beyond anything i could ever think of a good parent/step parent doing. it feels like he wanted to humiliate her to me. i know a little about emotional and mental abuse from having gone thru it myself, i remember having a siilar thing happen to me. i dont think it was right then either.

      • CarlK90245 August 21, 2011 / 11:48 pm

        Thanks. I had not seen that interview before.

  16. scott August 21, 2011 / 9:25 pm

    would like to add it was heartwrenching in her journals when she would say something like ‘i wonder what my mom is doing. i hope she’s happy wherever she is’. we, as the reader, know that terry would never be happy until jaycee came home.

  17. scott August 21, 2011 / 9:31 pm

    and carl……other then the thing about the reunion my posts were not directed at you.

    • CarlK90245 August 21, 2011 / 11:46 pm

      No problem even if they were. I don’t mind a little debate, as long as it stays civil.

  18. scott August 21, 2011 / 11:06 pm


    i cant imagine what that moment was like for them

  19. scott August 21, 2011 / 11:20 pm

    its also intresting and ironic that the first voice of her family she heard in 18 years was actually shayna….

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s