I feel kind of silly now

As y’all know, I posted that notice on Charley saying I’m sick and might not be updating as much or as often. This was after a solid week without updates, something that hardly ever happens. And I am, in fact, in a great deal of pain. I had to make my five thousandth trip to ER for my five thousandth shot on Wednesday.

(“So when did your headache start?” asked the nurse.

“Five months ago. Oh, and ten days.”

WHAT?”)

I got a lot of “get well soon” emails and such, and was very touched by that.

But the fact is that I stopped taking the morphine that caused me to sleep 20 hours a day — I decided it was not worth it, that I needed to live — and just live with the pain. When it becomes unbearable I go get a shot, or gulp some higher-than-recommended number of any of the ten or so kinds of painkillers I’ve got lying around. (And ER gave me another: Fioricet. Yay.) And the fact is that due to the inclement weather, I haven’t been able to go to school or to Michael’s. (I would be at Michael’s right now, but the roads are absolutely impassable. And they actually CANCELED school today, something about as rare as a solar eclipse. My dad has worked for that school for 37 years and count the number of cancellations on his fingers.) And the fact is that working on updates is as good a distraction as any from the vise clamped to my head.

So, yeah, I’m starting to feel like an idiot, regards that notice. Though it’s still true on the face of it.

My Cleveland Clinic consult can’t come fast enough.

12 thoughts on “I feel kind of silly now

  1. humanitarikim February 25, 2011 / 9:56 am

    Wow, that is a terribly long time to suffer from a headache. I hope you find peace soon.

  2. DEDE February 25, 2011 / 10:58 am

    MEAGHAN ,
    You area BRAVE SOUL,and SMART!
    I am so thankful and PROUD for you ,that ypou used such WISDOM in your ending Morphine .I can tell you ,personally i have a close friend lives about a mile ferom me has a MORPHINE PUMP in her body.SHE has almost died SO many times,overdose.She was completely incompacitated.NO LIFE ,no desire to do anything for herself.She forced herself to even eat.GOD BLESS her heart she decided against the Morphine and now she even brings in Firewood.Her LIFE is back,she sees her grandchildren and Life is far sweeter.GID BLESS you…you ARE in my PRAYERS.i am PROUD OF YOU!

  3. Jaime February 25, 2011 / 11:28 am

    I hope in the near future you do find some long term relief from this never ending headache. When do you go to the Cleveland Clinic?

    • Meaghan February 25, 2011 / 11:31 am

      I have a consult with them on March 13. I hope to obtain admission to their 3-week inpatient program at this time.

  4. Jaime February 25, 2011 / 3:16 pm

    I hope it all goes well. I hope u dont have any holdups problems etc.

  5. Jaime February 25, 2011 / 7:26 pm

    Dustin Wallowing age is wrong. It says 66 years of age. By his picture I think hes supposed to be 26.

  6. Jaime February 25, 2011 / 7:28 pm

    Oh so is Cristina Valasquez. she should be 15 I believe.

    • Meaghan February 25, 2011 / 7:57 pm

      Will fix. Dustin was a typo; Cristina a miscalculation. I just can’t do math. 😦

  7. Tracey Reitterer February 25, 2011 / 11:38 pm

    Hi Meaghan:
    I saw this in the news yesterday & thought you may want to include it in your updates to Carol Stallings Grannon’s case when you get a chance.
    Thank God for diligent LE officers like Eddie Walker who never give up on their promises to families of the missing. To know this poor woman was just right out back of the house, in a manhole in the alley for 12 years. The fact that she was still visable & recoverable after all that cement was poured in there over the years is incredible. Sad news for her family, but at least now they have answers & can bury her with some dignity.
    Tracey in MD

    http://www.charleyproject.org/cases/g/grannon_carol.html

    Subject: Remains of Carol Stallings Grannon recovered

    http://www.kjrh.com/dpp/news/local_news/human-remains-found-in-muskogee

    http://muskogeephoenix.com/local/x186200593/Confessed-Suspect-admits-to-killing-missing-wife-sheriff-says

    February 24, 2011

    Confessed: Suspect admits to killing missing wife, sheriff says

    By Donna Hales Phoenix Staff Writer The Muskogee Phoenix Thu Feb 24, 2011, 11:55 PM CST

    A Muskogee County Sheriff’s deputy told his children Thursday that after years of searching, their mother’s body had been found.

    Carol Stallings Grannon had been missing since 1999. She had four children who learned Thursday from the father of two of those children, Deputy Eddie Walker, about the remains being found.

    “Everybody’s been waiting for 12 years to hear some news,” Walker said. “I’ve been working on it since March 15, 1999. I told them I’d never quit until they found her.”

    Lawmen found what they believed to be Grannon’s remains in a manhole in the alley behind Jeff Grannon’s mother’s house in the 1100 block of Turner Street.

    Jeff Grannon confessed Thursday to killing his wife, said Sheriff Charles Pearson.

    Grannon, 56, of Muskogee is jailed in the Muskogee County/City Detention Facility. Formal charges have not been filed.

    Grannon’s son, Josh Grannon, 27, was arrested Tuesday night in a meth lab bust at a local motel and told deputies he wanted to talk about something special, said Sheriff’s Investigator Faye Banks.

    Josh Grannon was jailed on the drug charge. Pearson said Josh Grannon, who was Carol Grannon’s stepson, was present when Carol Grannon was killed.

    “Jeff Grannon is believed to have acted alone in the murder,” Banks said. “With the disposition of the body, he had some help.”

    Jeff Grannon was at the site most of the morning. Officials said he was walking around the neighborhood as police were looking into the manhole where remains were found.

    Police Chief Rex Eskridge said Grannon has had an arrogant attitude through the years when questioned by police.

    “He would say, ‘You have nothing on me, if you do, book me,’” Eskridge said. “Well, we have something on him, and he is booked.”

    Pearson said Grannon reached out to shake a policeman’s hand when the officer took his hand and arrested him.

    Grannon told police when he reported his wife missing that she was headed to Walmart the last time he saw her. She was 28 at the time.

    Her car was found later in the parking lot of the Oklahoma Department of Human Services on South 32nd Street.

    Walker said he told his daughter that her mother’s remains were found about 11:30 a.m. Thursday.

    One of her children, Elisha, was crying as she waited on her siblings to arrive at her home after getting the news.

    She said she was thankful to know what happened to her mother but sad, too. She said her father never gave up trying to find out what happened to her mother.

    Walker, on a combined drug task force the city and county operate, learned Wednesday night that officers might have found the location of his ex-wife’s body. He said he’d slept two hours in the last two days after realizing they might finally know what happened to her.

    “They (kids) were young, and now they’re older and have kids — it’s really been hard on them,” he said. “Now, they’ll have closure.”

    The youngest of Carol Grannon’s children was 8 when she went missing, and the oldest, Elisha, was 14, Eddie Walker said.

    Several times he felt like he wanted to give up, “But I promised the kids I’d never stop looking until she was found.”

    Police and sheriff’s investigators said the two agencies had worked on the case for 12 years. They’ve searched ponds, dug out basements, looked into wells, drilled through concrete, used cadaver dogs and followed every lead, Banks said.

    Police Lt. Bobby Lee said the case isn’t finished, and other suspects who may have known something will be questioned.

    The State Medical Examiner’s Office is sending a team to the site on Turner Street today to begin removal of the remains.

    Pearson said over the years there have been at least 20 bags of cement poured into the manhole where the bones are. Lawmen could see identifiable parts of the body remains, he said.

    Pearson said people should avoid the area where the Medical Examiner’s Office will be working today. If there is too much traffic in that area, people could be stopped and questioned, Pearson said.

    Reach Donna Hales at 684-2923 or dhales@muskogeephoenix.com.

  8. Jaime February 26, 2011 / 7:24 am

    I understand math is not my best subject either.

  9. danielle February 27, 2011 / 10:58 am

    what do they do at the three week in patient??

  10. Celeste February 27, 2011 / 12:09 pm

    Hey Meghan, anybody whocan help you withmanaging your pain it’s got to be a lotbetter than popping over 100 pills /day.

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